Milk, Cookies and Marshmallows
by wordspank
Summary: A four part Bangel christmas fic, for christmas cheer. Post s7 BtVS & s4 AtS. Angel's having one of the few loneliest nights on Christmas week, so he gets a visit from something unfamiliar...


Milk, Cookies and Marshmallows  
  
PG  
  
Disclaimer: The characters that are recognised and used in this story are all NOT mine. The ones you don't know, are. The songs used in this fic are performed by Diana Krall, only because I think they suit the occasion... They don't belong to me either.   
  
A/N: Post Season 7 BtVS/Season 4 AtS. A four part story for Christmas cheer. I hope you enjoy it, even if you're not that big of a bangel fan! ~~ denotes song lyrics. ** are his thoughts, or I'm just accenting words. ff.net has screwed up autoformats for windows docs.  
  
Part One  
  
"~Christmas time is here  
  
Happiness and cheer…~"  
  
"Your milk is good, Lorne. How did you make it?"  
  
"Well, I didn't. I got it with some help from my friends from a dairy farm, then it was delivered to a factory and all I really did was pay for it at the supermarket. Angelcakes, you gotta have some fun," the demon tried over the telephone." We're having an early part bash where it's the only time of year we ignore all calls and we head to the Hyperion for some intimate gatherings."  
  
Angel's finger extended and began to poke at the mini-marshmallows that floated atop the chocolate drink. He heard from someone long ago - Xander, was it?- that it was the best sort of comfort anyone could have, and Joyce made the best, with love.  
  
"I'll pass," the dark-haired vamp replied, watching the soft white bob about, "I don't feel like doing any celebrating. The Christmas Spirit's being saved for Christmas."  
  
"Sure you wanna be a sour puss and skip all the festive fun?"  
  
"Yeah. But thanks for asking. I'll see you soon. Merry Christmas."  
  
Lorne had wished the same, and hung up.  
  
"~Fun for all that children call  
  
their favourite time of-- ~"  
  
Angel reached over and turned the dial of the radio down. The soothing voice and the jazzy background did nothing to bring warmth that he missed so much to his heart. Even if he did accept Lorne's invitation, he'd be anything but having fun. There was far too much on his mind, and it was all because of the events that happened not too long ago.  
  
It was now just a lonely night during the week of Christmas.  
  
He picked up his mug and drank a bit, then wiped the milk moustache that had surely formed above his lip. He glanced at the calendar on the stand that was next to his bed. Just only a few days until Christmas. A few days until he would mope further. Perhaps he could get out and find monsters to beat up and take money from. Just something to pass the time… They day of festivity just reminded him of too many things.  
  
~Snowflakes in the air  
  
Carols everywhere~  
  
Angel turned while on his bed and lay on his back. He remembered snow. Most of the snow he'd been walking in was just stained with the blood of the innocent, or filled with so much drama and emotion. The words suddenly twisted in his mind and sounded out so clearly and loudly….  
  
*Buffy, Buffy, Buffy, Buffy…*  
  
A flash of guilt crossed him as he thought of the comatose Cordelia he so once had feelings for. *Darn this soul,* he thought. He couldn't possibly be in love with two women. *Yes, that's right, because I'm only in love with one. Loved, love, and still going to forever, like I'm bound to her fate.  
  
If I said that that one woman I love wasn't Buffy, I'd be lying to myself.*  
  
He had settled his feelings. He figured that he could have as much sex as he wanted, but he could never take that step again with her, for she truly was the only one who let him have that single jolt of emotion. That was what he figured out, and that was what was driving him crazy. *Having sex with Buffy?* He asked himself, *No, being happy with Buffy.*  
  
~Olden times, and ancient rhymes  
  
Of love and dreams to share~  
  
Now, staring at the ceiling was all he could do, as some form of semi-comfort.  
  
"Hey, yo, my warrior brother, what is up wit' you?"  
  
The vampire shot right up from bed with a knitted brow and a wrinkled forehead. "What?"  
  
"How are you on this fine evenin'?"  
  
He had demon vision and all that, but Angel had to rub his eyes. Before him was a dark-skinned man in a bandanna and a hip hop/grunge look. Like he was from the ghetto, as Gunn used to say. "Who the hell are you?"  
  
"Guess?"  
  
"I don't want to." Defensively, he lunged towards the character. His shoulder met with the dresser instead, and the man folded him arms. "You're a ghost."  
  
"Y'don't say," he replied with a roll of his eyes.  
  
"Wait," Angel said, getting up and smoothing his hair outwards, "I think I might know who you are… You're the Spirit of Christmas Past, aren't you?"  
  
"Yo' ass," he replied, "Winston isn't any Spirit of past present and future, but I can kick yo' ass through all of that and here." He shoved his hands in his large pockets. "The Powers just sent me down a Christmas gift."  
  
Angel just blinked. "Okay, I lost you at 'the Powers'."  
  
"Come on," Winston stretched out, "take my hand."  
  
He just stared, unsure of what it meant. *What if I wound up in a hell dimension, and he was really just a monster I have to fight?*  
  
"Okay, you're thinking, what if you came up in a hell dimension, and all I really am is a oogly-rah-ragh you gotta slay." He coaxed Angel, "Let's see if that really happens."  
  
Reluctantly, the champion took the ghost's cold hand, far colder than he ever had been, and he felt himself being shifted in the air. Once, twice the static feeling came across his skin like a spark that drove a chill up his spine and made his hair stand on end. Then, he warped, and felt his vision switch.  
  
*Oh my God,* he thought. "What the hell happened?"  
  
"You're temporarily my kind."  
  
"I'm a ghost?!" he stepped back.  
  
"Not quite, but getting there." Winston nodded his head towards one direction. "Right there."  
  
As Angel walked, he felt nothing. Just nothing, like he was walking around in the sky. He looked down at his feet, and saw that he was about a foot above the ground, and he let out a strange 'hmm' sound.  
  
"That happens a lot. Most people just scream," his new-found friend said. "In that building."  
  
"What's in that building?"  
  
"Be patient, alright? You're such a kid."  
  
"I'm not a kid."  
  
"A two hundred and fifty something kid, you are. Now be quiet and follow me."  
  
Angel pursed his lips together tightly and shoved his hands into his duster pockets. That seemed to work, even if he was of the ghastly variety now.  
  
The place they were heading to seemed to be an apartment building, painted grey over obvious red brick, with the streetlights dotted and scattered on the sides of the street unevenly in front of it. When both men -uh, spectres - came to the side of it, Winston gave a smile and went through it, then stuck an arm out to let the vamp know he was still there. With slight hesitation, he took a step forward and passed through it.  
  
-Whoosh.-  
  
That was what went through his mind as he felt the same, -whoosh-, and he was outside a door, 316. "Go in," Winston prodded, and Angel did. He passed through the door quickly, and he felt the molecules surge past him. It was awkward, doing this through-the-wall thing all the time. He ignored it, and looked around the room.  
  
~Sleigh bells in the air  
  
Beauty everywhere~  
  
The first person he came across was a familiar, aged man. Not that aged, for he would take the issue to heart for sure. "Giles," he noticed immediately. Giles sipped his wine and nodded, looking around. *At least he can hear me.*  
  
Angel ventured further in the room, decorated with what looked like a few feather boas here and there, used as makeshift decorations. The place was bright with little lights, both coloured and plain off white, and the partying spirit Lorne usually had was definitely a presence here. The tree, to his right upon entering, was a little taller than Angel's own height, and on it hung pictures of possibly everyone he could have been close to, during his time in Sunnydale. But this place; it was no Sunnydale. It seemed far better than that. The presents under the tree were of all sizes, all shapes, and the people who bought them looked like they didn't quite that good a gift-wrapping skill. He turned to the left and saw almost everyone, Xander, strangely, with a patch over one eye and Willow, seated next to him with light, mid-length auburn hair. She held a plastic cup of punch and the other hand was on the table, and it seemed to inch closer to his hand.  
  
Angel chuckled. In front of him was a little arch, to which Faith walked through. She looked a bit dishevelled, greeting, "Hey," and behind her, Dawn pushed her aside, bringing out bread pudding. Everyone seemed to be here, all except *Buffy*.  
  
~Yuletide by the fireside  
  
And joyful memories there~  
  
He looked around again. Winston came up behind him a placed a hand on his shoulder. "Is everything okay?"  
  
"Yeah, pretty much." Angel turned to him. "The Powers had some gift, huh."  
  
"She's in the kitchen. Just wait."  
  
Funny how Winston could read his mind. Quite soon, she came out, and brisked to the tree. Angel stepped aside, letting her pass. "She still looks the same from the last time I saw her." Without waiting for a reply, he stooped next to her. She knelt, and started to take the presents one by one, and put them in a different position. He put himself in front of her, just watching her. But she didn't seem to notice him at all, despite the short distance apart that they were from each other.  
  
~Christmas time is here~  
  
So now, he decided to reach out to her.  
  
-Whoosh. Or Voom.-  
  
That was what it felt like, when his finger passed straight into her. She had stopped and grimaced for the slightest moment, and ignored the feeling. *No,* he thought, *I want to just touch her this once.* So he tried again, harder, but this time, he went through, and his hand stuck out of her back strangely. He retracted.  
  
Winston appeared beside him in the blink of an eye. "You can't do that. You can't feel her, not in this state." He folded his arms. "I'm sorry, but all I was supposed to do was to let you see how she was doing, not anything else."  
  
"I don't really care," Angel snapped, and tried again.  
  
*I want to kiss her.*  
  
Buffy just had this look on her face, like there was something going on, but she just couldn't quite place a finger on it. *Oh God, I want to kiss her so bad.*  
  
With a useless breath, he leaned forward to place his hands on either side of her face, and he wanted to just press his lips against hers, so softly.  
  
And he did.  
  
When he pulled back, his hands had gone through her again, and the slayer had the most surprised, shocked and startled look altogether. A present lay in her lap as her hands had been frozen, and her jaw hung.  
  
~We'll be drawing near~  
  
Winston had his jaw hung as well. "I didn't even get to do *that* with my wife… It ain't fair, dammit."  
  
But all Angel could do was heave himself lungs full of air, and he stood, to leave her alone. She now seemed to be in deep thought, as her sister had noticed what had happened. Dawn asked, "What's wrong?"  
  
Buffy replied, "Nothing…" and her sister smiled and tended to the dinner table. "…It just seemed so familiar…"  
  
The broody vampire refused to brood any longer, and felt slight joy coming up to him. Nothing of the pure variety, but good enough to leave him satisfied. He took steps back towards his guide and looked one last time before he told him, "I'd like to go back now."  
  
"I'll kick yo' ass back, for what you did. It wasn't fair.'  
  
"It was, only that I just wanted it bad enough." At the same time, it was like he was telling himself why it happened.  
  
"Whatever, I'll just send you back."  
  
And -whoosh-.  
  
~Oh, that we could always see~  
  
"I can feel my bed," Angel said quite happily.  
  
"Don't you go losing that soul o' yours, bunny boy, we don't want any troubles." Winston sighed and gave a smile he couldn't resist giving. "Merry Christmas." He turned to disappear.  
  
"Wait," Angel stopped. "Tell the Powers that I said 'Thank you'."  
  
"You already did." He chuckled. "I'll leave 'em a memo anyway."  
  
And with that, he walked through the wall, and that was the end.  
  
Angel lay back, and a smile formed on his face. *Why the hell am I so happy that I got to kiss her?* He turned the dial of the radio on. Oh, right… I'm in love with her. And for the rest of the night, he felt like he wasn't alone any longer, and he wasn't going to mope that much after all. *Merry Christmas, Powers.*  
  
*Merry Christmas, Buffy.*  
  
A/N: Merry Christmas, folks. Ok, that was very bangel, I'm sorry. Review, please! This was supposed to be due yesterday, but I guess I didn't quite have the time. So review my hard work! 


End file.
